Truth can be painful, or make you spit out your coffee and get the keyboard dirty.

More of these at Top Conservative Cat's facebook page. Hey Newty, it's been a long time!

What goes around comes home to roost, or something

Turnout in the Republican primaries is seriously low, Kos in person reports, and Dr. Newt Gingrich, million-dollar historian and famed verbal terrorist with the international Belgian colonialist conspiracy, thinks he knows why: it's that rotter Romney, or rather the SuperPac that isn't coordinated with him, I mean of course it isn't coordinated with any candidate—that would be against the law!—but it's more specially not coordinated with Romney than anybody else, Restore our Future (a terrific retroactionary name, by the way, with its evocation of a future that has become a little shabby and shopworn, so that we need to spiff it up somewhat before we carry it with us on our long march into the long ago).

Fire belly Newt. From IMproPRieTies.

Anyway, Gingrich says it is all the negative advertising that is driving the voters into staying home, and he may well be right (even a stopped clock etc.).  According to Wikipedia [jump]

If you call it winning

As you've heard, Romney won the Iowa caucus with a little under 25% of the vote, eight more votes than his frothy opponent, but that's not all; if you measure the votes he got against all the votes that were theoretically possible, it was 30,015 out of 614,913 currently registered Republican voters in Iowa or 4.88% of the total. That's worse than Board of Education elections used to be in New York City before the mayor took over and made it an imperial personal fief, like Congo was for King Leopold of the Belgians.

And when we speak of Belgians are we thinking of beer? Are we thinking of wafels & dinges on top? Or are we thinking of Dr. Newton Leroy Gingrich, erstwhile million-dollar historian and Belgian colonialist terrorist, now apparently gone to the bumwhush, according to Al Dahler:

According to John Mactaggart's 1824 Scottish Gallovidian Encyclopedia, "When anything has made a noise for some time, and it is then quashed, it is said to have 'gone to the bumwhush.'"

I'm feeling almost grateful to him for helping to bring me into contact with such a luscious new word. Bumwhush! Bumwhush! Bumwhush!

In happier times

We hear that former job creator-by-attrition--or is it creative destroyer of jobs? ("I am Shiva, destroyer of jobs!")--Willard Mitt Romney is now offering a stump speech that describes President Obama as an adherent of this truly lost historical crypto-anarchist clubhouse Communism:

"[Theodore] Roosevelt believed that government should level the playing field to create equal opportunities. President Obama believes that government should create equal outcomes.

"In an entitlement society, everyone receives the same or similar rewards, regardless of education, effort, and willingness to take risk. That which is earned by some is redistributed to the others. And the only people who truly enjoy any real rewards are those who do the redistributing—the government."

Holy cannoli, Emily, I just got used to having a socialist president, an' now it turns out he's the whole fracking Khmer Rouge?

The President in traditional Cambodian scarf or krama, in found art from the Siem Reap–resident bloggist and web designer Jinja, via Travel-Artist. Yes, it makes me happy too. Set me up for indefinite detention without charge, target me for execution by drone, I just can't stay mad at him. I'm sure we'll get an explanation sooner or later.

Newt Gingrich, plucky little imperialist

Image from http://cannabis.wikia.com/wiki/Newt_Gingrich

It all goes back to grad school. The most profound insight I have read in the last six years about Newt Gingrich. What if he is so outside our comprehension that only if you understand Belgian, pro-colonialist behavior can you begin to piece together what he does? That is the most accurate, predictive model for his behavior.... This is a person who is fundamentally out of touch with how the world works, who happened to have played a wonderful con, as a result of which he is now, umm.... What exactly is he?

Just another radical Belgian activist? Tintin, after the mussels and frites begin to take their toll, and with a Congressional hairdresser? The supremely evil twin of that other Tintin? Sadly, it seems unlikely.