Friday, May 3, 2013

Cheap shots, and a Sex On The Beach for the minority leader

The Tim Brando sex tape? From Every Day Should Be Saturday.
Depends what's on the tape, Tim. What have you got? Here's a suggestion: judging from how far you got your foot in, you seem to have a pretty Deep Throat, so you might want to think along those lines.

Hello, sailor! What's your poison? Via TPM.
Senator McConnell attempting to look friendly, with Clint Eastwood's chair and glass of wine evidently for the prophet Elijah or St. Joseph, depending on your persuasion and the time of year. Actually, no: the chair and the drink are both of course supposed to be for President Obama. Two questions raise themselves immediately in the mind of the structural anthropologist. First, why the chair instead of the barstool, so that if the president does sit down, his eyes will be at the level of the senator's substantial embonpoint? Second, why does the senator give himself a beer while the president is invited to take a dainty glass of pinot noir? I think I know the answer to the second one, that he wishes to present himself as Mitch Sixpack and the other guy as the Sheriff of Nottingham.

If so, I'm here to warn you, Senator, this is not going to work. As a Kentuckian, you could get away with bourbon, at least on Derby Day, but there's no way anyone will accept you as a beer guy. They will flee in fear.
Hint: Policies don't do anything, Mr. Speaker. Until your legislature enacts them.

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